Learning about suffering, the hard way

Although I have been having an amazing time here in Ghana, this week, finally starting nursing work in the teaching hospital in Tamale, has undoubtedly been one of the hardest and most heartbreaking experiences I have ever had. The patients are the sickest people I have ever seen, especially on the surgical ward that Jackie and I were on for 2 days this week. Most of them were completely emaciated, just skin and bones, and had a listless, hopeless expression. Most often by the time people get to the hospital here it is much too late, and most very sick people will not make it. Pain control is not something that is often practiced here, as people are taught to be strong and not show pain/weakness. Narcotics are frowned upon, therefore never used, and other pain killers, such as ibuprofen are used but very infrequently. The resources and supplies at the hospital are severely limited, and there is not even any running, drinkable water for thirsty patients to drink. Jackie and I have ended up emptying our own water bottles so that some of our patients can have some water. It is heartbreaking. Witnessing anyone suffering and knowing you cannot do much to help is one of the worst feelings, and this is even further magnified when it is a child in pain. For most of the afternoon of our first shift Jackie and I cared for a young man, 18 years old, who had typhoid fever and developed a perforated bowel as a result, leading to a terrible infection and a huge swollen belly. He was definitely going downhill but I think we were able to provide him with some comfort and show him love as best as we could. Sadly, he did not make it through the night and when Jack and I returned to the ward this morning, he was not there. Heartbreaking. So glad Jackie and I had each other there otherwise I don't know how I could have made it through the day! We had to take a few cry breaks to debrief multiple times over the past two days. The style of nursing here is so different than what we are used to and what we are taught in school. People are yelled at for moaning/crying while in pain. Today we were watching a nurse roughly change a dressing on a child who had extensive burns on his face, chest and arms. As no pain killer was used and the nurse was being rough rubbing his wounds, he was screaming out in excruciating pain. The nurse got upset and slapped the boy. Jackie and I had to leave the room and we burst out crying. It is so hard to watch something like that happen and know that we can't do anything about it.

But despite all this I am trying to find the beauty and positive in everything I experience while here. Even though the conditions in the hospital are awful and the treatment is not always great, at least the hospital is there and some people are being treated and getting better. Jackie and I ended the day by handing out canada stickers to teh kids and they seemed to really like that. Nice positive note to end on!

Tomorrow we go to a surgeons clinic on the outskirts of town who performs free surgeries with all the donations he receives from various sources. I have a feeling this will be a bit of a more uplifting experience and I am really looking forward to it!

Love you all!